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“Desiderium” is a modern day ritualistic machine experience that, through bearing responsibility of self, asks the audience to consciously partake in the risk that comes with it. The visceral journey therefore requires mental participation and Risk analysis that includes battling the ego’s stories, which in turn always lovingly tries to protect us, but withholds us from emotional growth. “Desiderium” offers a form of catharsis that holds its self in the loss of time and space, through a vast visual and audible wall of impulses, that allows you to fall into yourself, and self remembrance. As an ode to my ancestors, Dutch Fishermen, that understood the mercilessness of the sea but nevertheless engaged in a deep relationship with her, I long for these relations, feel Desiderium for it and simply attempt to understand and to be stronger than yesterday.


Desiderium is a 5 meter tall, visceral machine that both audibly and visually demands the audience’s attention. The audience is confronted with a fearful and yet cathartic situation as the machine plays its composition, (composed by the artist) that shoots between the extreme highs and the extreme lows, making not only the installation and the space that it’s inclosed in shake, vibrate and resonate but also the observer’s entire body as well. The size, spatial composition and choice of materials all have relations to both ritualistic experiences of the artist and extreme rituals researched for his thesis. By completely stepping into the work starting in a pitch black room that slowly starts growing and growing in size and reality by the use of monochromatic lights, the observer is able to truly step into a different world, and within combination of the extremity of the sound and visuals completely lets go of past and future, and in some cases, even the present. 


Materials used: Mylar foil, 3phase motors, aluminium piping  

scaffolding feet, scaffolding clamps, SOX ligths (lowpressure sodium) pulley system, VFD controllers, Arduino nana every. 

Royal academy of arts Gradshow - 2020

Club Holiday - 2021

LichtKunstfestival Gouda - 2022 

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